Out of the depths I cry to you, O Lord
The alarm pierced my sleep, as it always did every morning. I rolled over to slap the snooze button and the clock read 6:00AM. I knew that I only had a few more precious minutes of sleep left, so I hit snooze and rolled back over. Again the alarm shook me back to reality and whatever dream I was having whisked away and it was soon forgotten. I sat up in my bed and while a part of me wanted to get back to sleep, another part of me was glad to be up. I had just been transferred back to the Watertown warehouse and I was looking forward to really getting back into the swing of things. I pulled on my pants that had been lying on the floor from the night before. I pulled out one of work t-shirts and threw on some socks. I grabbed my shoes and lumbered down the stairs, still in a daze. It was 6:30AM and I knew I had at least twenty minutes before I had to leave. I laid on the couch and turned on the TV to ESPN so I could catch a bit of Sportscenter. I didn't see a thing but I heard as the anchors went through a myriad of stories and highlights. Before I knew it it was almost 7:00AM and time for me to leave. I locked the door behind me and stepped out into the new day. It was cloudy and it looked as though it might rain. As I descended my stairs to the street that morning was just like every other day, nothing special, just another day.
I got to work and quickly immersed myself in my work. It was easy to get lost in work especially as the manager. You would think given the demands of the customer and the promises of the call center that we ere dealing in vital organs. But we weren't, we sold auto parts. Don't get me wrong I truly enjoyed what I did as a job but sometimes I often wondered about the nature of the business. Like I said before, it was easy to become so involved with the day's events that I easily forgot about everything else that lay beyond the concrete walls of the warehouse. There was a lot to forget about and push outside of my mind. Was I ever going to get my butt back in school and finish my degree? Was my job as manager lead somewhere better within the company? Was this to be my career? Was my hope of becoming a priest just a pipe dream? Was he going to get better?
He had been in the hospital for several weeks as the doctors were trying to clear up some minor issues before going through with a major surgical procedure. I was so happy that this was finally a reality, that he might just be able to get things under control and become healthier. There was a lot of hope for the future. However the operation kept getting postponed for one reason after another and I just prayed that it would happen soon so that we could move on to a new chapter of our lives together. He had celebrated his birthday in a hospital bed five days earlier. It was nothing major, just a few cards along with my mother, my brother and myself. We were all just so hopeful about what was to come.
Thursdays were my early day, a day in which I was able to leave around 2:30 and have the rest of the day off. I was looking forward to that early day as a chance to go home and relax. Then around 1:45 or so my cell phone rang, it was mom. At first I couldn't tell anything in her voice, but she told me to come to the hospital after I get off work because he had been transferred there. I hung up with her and something washed over me. I knew something wasn't right. I kept looking at the clock and anxiously waited for 2:30 to get there so I could leave and see what was up. I became more and more unnerved. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and I bolted to my car and sped off. I don't remember stopping for red lights or stop signs, and I have no idea how much time had passed but I pulled up to the emergency room parking lot and left my car illegally parked. The sky had become dark as I drove and when I got out of my car raindrops were falling.
I ran into the emergency room and I was directed down a hallway. I was moving quickly, unsure of what awaited me. I saw my mother and she was in tears...and then I knew. I just stopped. My world just came crashing down around me. My heart cringed with pain. My stomach turned. My eyes teared up. He was gone, like that...he was gone. Our parish priest arrived and for what seemed like hours, though it was only a few minutes, we sat there trying to understand what had happened. We were then escorted in to see him. It was like a dream. I kept thinking, Rob wake up, this isn't real. But I could not wake up. It was my reality. My mom slid his wedding ring off of his finger, it was the first time it had ever left his hand. We said a few brief prayers and we left. I walked outside into the pouring rain, got in my car, and drove off.
I drove back to the Watertown and walked straight to Jeff's office. I shut the door and sat down. I filled him in with the details of what happened that day. He offered his condolences and support. I never forgot that nor the support that I received from everyone with the company and for that I am forever grateful. I was only in there for about five minutes and then I got up and left. I know that everyone in the call center watched me enter and leave Jeff's office and were curious as to what was going on, but I walked right by them and made my way to the parking lot. After a few minutes of standing there in the rain I got in my car and left. What had started off as just another day turned out to be a day that I would never forget, a day that changed my life forever.
I learned a valuable lesson that day. Don't wait to tell someone that you love them, or that you are sorry for something, or how important that person is to you. We always believe that we will have tomorrow and that we can do it at a later date, but tomorrow is never guaranteed. I learned the hard way. What we do have is this time, the time that God has given us right now. Don't put off something that should be done today, because you just might miss that opportunity. And just like that...it's gone.
Your light was extinguished too early, but I know, as surely as I believe in God, that we will meet again.
SRS
11/10/52 - 11/15/2007
Into paradise may the angels lead you. At your coming may the martyrs receive you, and bring you into the holy city Jerusalem.
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